sábado, 21 de abril de 2007

Grand Theft Auto Beirut

Story

It's 2006 and Tommy Vercetti is now living in the Lesbian capital of Beirut. Now in his 50s, Tommy is a dirty old man with an insatiable sex drive. Having retired from killing 20 years ago, Tommy spends his days hooking up with all the lesbians in Beirut and making them straight. Cheap land values have allowed Tommy to purchase vast sections of the countryside with his vast fortune. Tommy's carefree days come to a crashing halt one day, when Israel decides to invade. Tommy must now loot all his houses and get as many of his hookers out of the country as possible before the Israelis destroy it all. Once his loot is outside of the city, Tommy joins the ranks of Hezbollah and quickly rises up into the upper levels of command due to his superior markmanship and his insanely high amount of kills. Through his excellent skills, Hezbollah is able to build up an even stronger army, with a bunch of badass military equipment that rivals the stuff the Israelis have. He singlehandly invades Israel with one tank and destroys most of Tel Aviv before he swims back to Beirut.

Tommy runs from an Israeli military helicopter.
The enemy.

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